Thinking too much

Today at church I had a revelation. Not the kind you're thinking of.

No, my revelation was much more mundane than the kind of epiphany you'd expect during Advent. It came as I was listening to the choir and thinking for 199th time that I ought to join the choir. Midway through that 199th thought it occurred to me: if I join the choir, then I have to go to worship every single Sunday. That could be a problem. As much as I love church, I can't make that commitment.

So that got me thinking even further: I should have just signed up and been done with it. Everything I have done of which I am proud I have done without thinking. At age six I signed up for violin lessons because I wanted to be like my cousin. At age sixteen I applied to Brown because, well, it was there. At age nineteen I founded a campus chapter of Habitat for Humanity because I felt like it. Also at age nineteen I volunteered to be a resident counselor, which any former resident advisor knows is definitely not a rational decision. And at age twenty-five I matriculated at Boston College Law School because there was just something about it that made it different from anywhere else. So I got to meet the Captain and all my other cherished lawyer friends, as well as pass the bar. I did all these without too much thinking, and there's got to be something to that. All my thinking today just led to my not doing something, rather than forging ahead.

Maybe I'm just getting old.